Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Help me help you realize you are a moron
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
