Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
worst night to have a conscience
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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