After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Randomize
