ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
