I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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