): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
