is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
