The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize