bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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