You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize
