how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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