My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
