I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
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