Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
