i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Randomize