so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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