Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Say something about gay babies.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
