Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize