My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
