Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
