Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
