you guys were way drunker than both of me
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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