i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize