Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
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