Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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