Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
