HIV tests are more positive than that guy
so explain again why im purple
no
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Randomize