At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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