New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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