I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
