Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
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