I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
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