Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I enjoy the company of your penis
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize