What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
