btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
