Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(571): View more from Virginia

I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life

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(702): View more from Nevada

oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve

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(336): View more from North Carolina

you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.

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(269): View more from Michigan

All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.

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(270): View more from Kentucky

how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."

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(407): View more from Florida

I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.

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(757): View more from Virginia

This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Beard. Chest hair. Job.

(602): View more from Arizona

The holy trinity.

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