i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
