i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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