thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
