i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Are we still banned from the library?
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
