I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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