I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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