You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
