So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
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