its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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