Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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