its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
