The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
