Rock
Scissors
Fuck
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
