Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
